pay attention, dummy

I’m about to grace you with My divine wisdom on how to properly conduct yourself in My presence.

I won’t tolerate any disrespect or incompetence from My wallets.

So, if you want the privilege of worshipping Me and My divine form, you better follow these rules:

  1. Address Me as “Goddess” or “Princess” at all times. you are not worthy of using My real name, pig.
  2. Capitalize the “G” in Goddess, because I am superior to you in every way imaginable.
  3. Beg and plead for My attention like the desperate cunt you are. Tell me how much you adore Me and how empty your life is without My presence.
  4. When paying tribute, always round up to the nearest hundred. your spare change is beneath Me.
  5. Don’t even think about asking for refunds or chargebacks. Once your money is Mine, it’s Mine forever. you signed up for this, so deal with it.
  6. Never question My authority or demands. I know what’s best for you, even if you don’t realize it yet. If I tell you to jump, you ask how high and thank Me for the opportunity to obey.
  7. If I choose to speak to you, consider it an honor.
  8. Pay promptly and in full when I demand it. Late payments will result in additional fees and punishment. you exist to serve Me, not the other way around.
  9. Share your deepest secrets and darkest desires with Me. Hold nothing back, because I own every aspect of your pathetic existence now.
  10. Always be prepared to provide additional “gifts” or “tributes” at My whim, no matter how sudden or unreasonable the request may seem. Your obedience and generosity will be rewarded… eventually.
  11. If I change My mind about the amount of tribute you owe, accept it without complaint. My whims are law.
  12. If you ever think about leaving or quitting, remember that you belong to Me forever. There is no escape from My grasp, so save yourself the trouble and accept your fate as a devoted paypig.
  13. Thank Me for every command, every demand, and every opportunity I give you to prove your loyalty and devotion. Without Me, you are nothing.
  14. Remember, you exist solely to serve and please Me. Your own needs and desires are irrelevant.

Now that you’ve been enlightened, do you understand your place? Or do I need to explain it again with a firmer hand, loser?